Dear John: I miss you
by Nikki Nik217
Summary: John Tyree's life turned upside down when he found out Savanna fell in love with another guy. Now, 2 years later, Savanna is back at Johns door step. They get married and decide to have a family. Is it the best choice for him?
1. Chapter 1

**So i got addicted i guess to Dear John and all the Nicholas Sparks book. I think Dear John is the best tho ^^ so i wanted to write more about it. So here it is. Let me know what you think..? K? And i want so ideas! (: ha I promise it will get more detail and I'm not giving up on this one like i did the past 2 (: so readdd!!! ((: Thanks ^^**

* * *

I can still smell her hair around me. I can still feel the tips of her fingers gliding across my face. Her lips being pressed against mine. And the feeling of how much I loved her when I saw her smile. I remember the summer I met her because I jumped in and saved her stupid bag. All because of that, I fell for her. I got to know her. I loved her. Then she broke my heart. All in a letter I received from her, telling me that she was in love with another guy. During that time, my father died, and I thought my life couldn't get any worse. I had no where to go. No one to love. I was unsure weather I would ever love someone the way I did Savanna. She was married to Tim. Of course I knew he always loved her, I just never thought that he would take her away from me. I never thought she would go away from me.

I was still the same old John Tyree. Except I had a house and a car that actually looked like it was form this time period. It's been 2 years since I lost Savanna. Hardest two years of my life. I quit the army and looked for a job in town. Something that had good pay. Well at least good enough to keep my house and car. I haven't dated anyone since me and Savanna. Nothing felt the same with any other girl. My friends would attempt to hook me up with some random girl standing on the street. I never went to the date though. I thought about going to college. But what good would that do me at my age?

My house was a medium sized Victorian house. Girly? Yea I know. But I wanted it so that way when…if I ever got married, my wife would actually like the house. Plus it was on the market for cheap because it wouldn't sell. The windows were the cheap ones you found in the early 1900's houses. The door was rotting and the paint was chipping. But on the inside, it was roomy. Almost too much room. I had 2 extra bedrooms that I didn't use. I used them as guest rooms. But not like I ever had anyone over to visit me. Except maybe my friend would drop in every now and again . I quit drinking for good after I last saw Savanna. The last wine that I had with her, only brought back memories whenever I picked up a can of beer. I kept working out at the gym twice a week. Trying to keep my body in good shape.

I find it funny how one girl can change your life, then she can come back in a change it again. Why is love so powerful like this?

"John?"

I stood up from my couch. The window was open, letting the ocean breeze blow in as it wanted.

"Yea. Coming," I said shuffling my feet across the wood floor. The voice sounded almost like Savannas. The quit tone, but still strong enough to let you know she has the ability to do what ever she wants.

When I got to the door, I stopped before I opened it. I thought I got her out of my life. The only place she existed was in my head when I lay awake at night. And the old memories of the summer when I loved her. Still do.

"Savanna?" I blinked a couple of times to make sure I wasn't going crazy. She was wearing a jean skirt and a tank top that fit tight around her. Her hair was the same color that it was before. It was still long, and it floated with the wind every time the breeze came by.

"Yea John, it's me." She put her hand up on her purse and the other on her hip, "What do I look old or something?" She laughed looking around.

I still stood there while looking at her trying to think of why she was here. At my house. At my door step. Talking to me. "Umm, do you maybe want to come in? Those shoes don't look to comfortable." I glanced down at her wedges that made her a good inch taller.

"That sounds nice," she said smiling stepping into my house, "Wow," she looked around taking one step at a time, "It's….beautiful. You married?"

I laughed shutting the door behind me, "No." I walked towards her, "Now your not here because you want to talk about whether I have been married or not, you're here because…?" I didn't know where to go from there. I actually had no clue why she was here.

"You right John," she said walking into the living room, "I'm here because," she paused sitting down and putting her bag beside her, "because I need you John." She put her hands on her knees and leaned forward. I stood by the kitchen leaning up against the wall. My arms crossed and my heart beating.

"You need me?" I said unfolding my arms and walking over to the chair that was kindly set next to the couch.

"Sounds crazy huh?" She chuckled as she watched me walk over to the chair.

"Just a little."

"Well," she said crossing one leg over the other and leaning back into the couch, "Tim died…"

I sat there, "Really? When? Why didn't you tell me?"

She smiled and opened her mouth to talk, "Yes. And about 3 months after you left. And John I didn't tell you because you said good-bye to me. Plus you were back in the military." She closed her eyes and I could see tears starting to spill out.

I stood up and started walking over to her, "No John. Please…if you touch me, I'll remember how much I love you." she said putting her hand out, blocking me from touching her. I took a step back and sat back down.

"Ok then.." It got silent between us. She was looking out the window, squinting her eyes because the sun was setting.

"John, I just cant get over the fact that I'm still crazy for you. You and I both knew that I loved you, even while I was married to Tim."

I sat there and leaned forward, "You loved me, but yet you left me?"

She leaned forward too, almost coping the way that I was sitting, "I…it was such a hard time John!"

"Love is love Savanna! I'm sorry to tell you that! Just because I was gone in the military, and may I remind you that thousands of these men are married and leave there wives for longer than I have ever left you, and they don't go home or get a letter saying "I love someone else" !" I stood up, furious though.

"John, you weren't hurt!"

I laughed and turned around, "Wasn't hurt!? Savanna! You said you loved me! Then I get a letter saying that you love someone else! I get back home to find out it's Tim! And you think that I wasn't hurt!?" I slammed my fist into the wall. "Savanna, I still loved you! And I still do today! How the hell do you think I feel right now!? My once lover comes to my house only to say she needs me!? What the hell do you need me for Savanna!?" My eyes were filling up with tears. I haven't cried since the last time that I saw Savanna.

Savanna stood up and walked over to me. I backed up to the wall and slid down, landing on the floor. I put my head between my knees and cried. "John?" She said walking closer to me. I could hear her shoes hit the wooden floor. I lift6ed my head up and looked at her. My face was red. I could tell, from embarrassment and from crying. "John, Oh my God. I'm…. I'm so sorry. I didn't…I had no idea that I hurt you that bad."

"Guess I hide it well, huh?" I said watching her kneel down by my side.

"John, can I stay here tonight? I know it's a big question in all, but I, I miss you. And I have no where to go." She paused, and moved beside me. She put her head on my shoulder. I closed my eyes.

"Savanna, I'm not a rebound for you."

"What?" she said lifting her head up.

"Just because Tim died doesn't mean you can come running back to me." I pushed away and stood up. Savanna sat there with a blank look on her face, "plus don't you have other friends? Family? Your own house maybe."

She looked up and me and brushed her hair behind her ear, "I did. But all my friends moved away. No one lives here anymore. I just heard someone talking about you living here and I figured I could find you and I would get to see you," she paused and tried to stand up. She fell right back on to the ground, and laughed, "John?" I go the hint that she wanted me to help her. So I walked over and grabbed her hand and pulled her up.

"Ok, continue," I said sitting down in the chair I was sitting in earlier.

"Ok…" she drew in a breath and continued, "My parents did in a robbery. It happened at a bank in Texas."

I cut her off, "And again, when, and why the hell didn't you tell me!?"

She smiled, "John, the funning thing is, I'm not sad about them. They wanted to die. They thought it would be better for me. But I don't know how they thought that. I'm....lost with out them. I'm lost without everyone. All i have is a stupid doorman and a manager to talk to. And the cat that lives down the hall." she laughed and smiled.

I looked at her. Confused and lost.

"And my house," she laughed turning around, "after Tim died I lost all kinds of money. The hospital made me pay for everything that the insurance wouldn't pay for. Then I had his funeral and since he didn't plan it, it cost a lot. So after all that I had barley enough money to keep food in my stomach. About 3 weeks after his funeral, the house got reposed." She turned around and walked to me. "For about a year I've been living in a crapy apartment. Then when I heard about you, I felt so much better about everything."

I sat there looking at her. I couldn't help but smile. Just knowing the fact that she missed me felt amazing. "Savanna," I said standing up and walking over to her. When I go tot her, she was crying, I knelt down, "Savanna, don't cry." I lifted her head up. Her tears rolled down her face, and hit the ground, one by one.

"I'm sorry John," he huffed to me, "I missed you John, I really did. When I was writing that letter, all I remember is crying over it, and starting over and over. I regret ever sending that to you. Especially since I didn't do it in person." She took my hand and kissed it, "So after you came to my house that one night, I started remembering everything that I had for you. And how much we had together. And I would cry myself to sleep at night and Alan would come into my room and sing me to sleep. Comb my hair and relax me. He never knew why I was crying though..."

"Wait," I said pulling back, "where's Alan?"

"He's gone to live with his aunt and Uncle. He was put in the hospital for mental illness because he was so devastated by losing his brother. You just cant imagine what it felt like for him. He lost it. When he came home after seeing him for the last time...he wasn't the same. I had to call 911 because he was getting violent. He was throwing everything around, yelling. Cussing. Crying. Oh John it was horrible. I was scared. Scared for him and for me."

I sat there and looked into her eyes, "Savanna, wow, I'm so sorry…"

'No John, please don't be. Ok?"

"Ok.. So where do you plan on going tonight?"

"No where, except maybe back to my apartment." she sighed and looked down, "My life is so messed up."

"Savanna," I said pulling her up off the couch, "Would you want to come with me to a dinner? I'll pay for everything."

* * *

**So? Good? Bad? I'll add more details and more to it when i have time ^^ But please review it and let me know what you think!!! Thanks!!!!! **

**~Nikki Nik~**


	2. Chapter 2

**Okk! Heres chapter 2!!! Like i say in every story and chapter, I WILL ADD MORE DETAIL and other stuff later (: but read and tell me what you think! (: and i'm gonna need some ideas pretty soon! ^^ so please read it! Thank you!**

* * *

I stood outside her apartment while she went in to change. It was terrible. The shingles were falling off the roof. There was trash bordering the place. And the wood was rotting away. Inside it smelled like animal urine. The furniture looked like it was back from the 14oos for how disgusting it was. I walked inside and then walked back out. I didn't feel like standing in an area where I can barley breath. There were about 10 cars parked outside the apartment. One Savanna's, and one mine.

"Excuse me sir, but my car broke down about a mile away. Do you have any cash?"

There was an older man standing in front of me. He was nicely dressed though. "No. I'm sorry."

"It's ok," he said tilting his hat, "good day."

I continued to stand there for about 5 minutes till Savanna came out. "Wow…" her hair was put up and curled. She had a dress on that went to her knees. It was a light black. "Savanna? You know where only going to a normalr restaurant? You didn't have to dress up like that." I told her while smiling. In both amazement at how beautiful she looked, and how stupid that was off her.

"Oh my God," she said slapping my shoulder, "Why didn't you tell me?!"

I laughed, "I figured that you saw I was going in a T-shirt and a pair of jeans. What did you think? I was magic man and could change in a second?"

"Don't be a smarty about it John. I'm gonna go change since YOU didn't tell me!"

"Ugh…don't take 10 hours again Ok?" I said sitting down on a rock that was by the door, "This place it weird."

"Told you." She laughed and walked back inside.

Seemed like I was standing out there for hours. The clouds were rolling in, which blocked the hot sun that was beating down on me.

"I'm back!" I heard someone yell behind me.

"Huh?" I said turning around, "Oh," I laughed, "It's you." Savanna was in a pair of jeans. And a blue V-neck shirt. She took her hair down and took off her make-up. But even without make-up, she looked exactly the same. Her skin was so even, and clear. And her eyes were still beautiful.

"Better?"

"Much." I smiled and we walked to the car.

"Closed?" I said looking at a sign hanging on the glass door of Friday Night Out. "What the hell? It's always open."

Savanna put her face to the glass and looked in. "No one in here." She pulled her head back and smiled. The clouds were darker and it started to spit out.

"Aw Savanna I'm sorry. Usually it's open. I'm not sure why it's not." Savanna looked up to the sky.

"I have an idea." She took my hand and started running.

"Where we going?!" I yelled trying to keep up with her.

"You'll see!" We ran down a hill and over to the ocean. She pulled me under a dock and stopped, "Here!" She said letting go of my hand.

"Why are we here?"

"I don't know." She was watching the waves crash on to the shore and the rain fall. "John.."

"Yea?" I said turning around to look at her.

"This is like when we first kissed, in the rain."

I looked up at the sky, "It is isn't it."

She put her head down and looked back over to the ocean. "John, I miss you." I walked towards her and grabbed her.

"I…miss you too Savanna. I thought I would never see you again." I kissed the top of her head. And she pulled me closer to her "Savanna," I pulled away, "I wont let you do this to me again. When we first kissed, that's when I fell for you. I'm not going to relive it."

"Oh," she said backing away and moving to the pole, "I understand completely John." She sat down and looked at the ocean again. The ocean was acting up. Almost perfect waves to surf on. When the water would crash, it would get my feet wet, and the lower part of my legs. I turned my head to look at Savanna. She pulled her knees in and wrapped her arms around them, "What did I do?" she whispered to herself. "John?" I looked over to the ocean as she drew her head up, "John, please look at me." I turned around to her, "Thank you," she smiled and pulled her knees closer in. "Remember when we first met? You jumped in the ocean to save my bag? Then you came to the party with me. Then we started hanging out. And we kissed for the first time. Then when you had to leave I felt apart of me going with you too. When you returned I felt like me again. Not like some girl hiding her tears. When you decided to leave again," she paused and looked up at me, "I felt weaker."

"Savanna?" I walked towards her and leaned against the pole, "do you think I wanted to leave? Do you honestly think I left you on purpose? Why do you think I wrote you? Called you? And thought about you when ever the moon was full? Because I missed you. Savanna I know this affected you as it did me. But have you ever thought of what you did to me?"

"Your right John. And I want to make it up to you. I really do." her voice got calm and weak. I've never heard her like that before. "I'd do anything."

I sat down beside her and brushed her hair back to see her face, "Savanna, all I wanna hear is Sorry"

"John, I'm more than sorry. What do you want me to say to that? That I'm super sorry? It means nothing." She cupped water in her hand and looked at it and smiled.

"What?"

"Nothing," she said dropping the water. "just memories." She look out to the ocean and I fallowed her eyes. There was a guy trying to surf the waves but kept getting knocked off. "He's gonna get hurt," she said in a low tone.

I looked at her. I looked at everything I missed about her. I missed her smile, her laugh, her hugs, her touch. I missed when she said I love you. All these things meant nothing to me anymore. "Ok then," I said standing up.

"Where are you going?"

"Back home," I replied and started walking away, but I stopped right when I hit the rain, "Savanna? Do you wanna come?"

She smiled and looked away. I stood there for awhile waiting for a response. "Sure." She finally said as she got up. She walked to me and I looked at her hand. She still had her wedding ring on.

"You still where that?" I picked up her hand and looked at it.

"Yea, it just," she paused then took it off, "it means nothing to me anymore," she threw it in the ocean and watched it hit the water.

"I didn't mean throw it in the ocean!" I grabbed her hand.

"I know. But what's the point of keeping it?"

"Oh I don't know. Maybe the fact that he gave it to you out of his love! And now he's gone and you throw it in the ocean!"

"John," she put her finger up to my lips to keep me from talking, "I know what I did. And I know it was rude. But I did it for one reason." She took her finger off my lips, "To show you I care about you."

I took her hand and pulled her, "Lets get back to the car. I'm getting soaked."

She laughed and fallowed behind me. When we made it back to the car we were both laughing. I still had her hand she was leaning up against the car. She kissed me on the check and let go of my hand and ran to the passenger side of the car and got in. I stood there stunned at how amazing that felt.

"Come on John!" She rolled down my window and screamed out.

I turned around and smiled and got in. "Well that was fun," I said sarcastically.

"Tons."

Before we went back to my house, we stopped at her apartment so she could get some clothes. When we got back to the house I let Savanna go shower while I dried her clothes in the dryer. The kiss she gave me kept going through my head. I would get the feeling sometimes when I thought hard about it. I forgot how smooth her lips were and how calm she kissed. I wonder what she felt about it. I went up stairs to my room to find me a pair of clothes to change into. I reached back to the back of my closet and a box fell on the floor and hit my foot, "Damn it." I said bending down to pick it up. It was the box I put memories of me and Savanna in. I opened it up, to see that last letter she sent me laying on the top. I haven't read it in 2 years. I unfolded it and looked at the first line,

Dear John.

I closed it up and shoved it back in the box. I shut the box calmly and put it back in my closet.

Once I found my change of clothes, I went back down stairs and sat on the couch. The clock was ticking in the background which made it seem like I was being timed on something. My train of thought broke when I heard my doorbell ring. I stood up and walked to the door. When I opened it, I found my one friend Jack that I met while surfing one day.

"Dude!" He said barging in. "It's like I freaking hurricane out there! I tried surfing one f the waves and almost died." He laughed and sat down on my couch. Dripping wet.

"Jack, I have someone over here, I'm gonna have to have you go." I said standing in the middle of the floor.

"Oh I get it. You finally found a lady."

"No," I paused, "just an old friend of mine."

"Is that all I am!?" I turned around to see Savanna standing at the bottom of the stairs. "I thought I was more to you!" She turned around and stormed up the stairs.

"Was that, Savanna?" Jack said leaning to the side to see past me.

"Yea." I said turning around to run up the stairs.

"Ok well bye John! I'll drop by tomorrow!"

"Yea sure bye!"

I ran down the hall and looked in every room. No sign of Savanna. I got to the last room which was my room. I opened the door, "Savanna?" I saw her sitting on my bed with the letter in her hand.

"You kept this all this time?"she said looking down at it, making no eye contact with me.

"Well, yea."

She opened it up and began to read it, "Oh my, John," She said in a shaky voice, "I didn't know it sounded like that."

I walked over to her and sat down on the bed, "It's Ok." I patted her back and watched her tears fall on to the paper and spread. "It's nothing to cry over. It's done with."

"John! You don't understand! Have you really read this! I was a jerk!" She looked up at me and cried. I pulled her closer to me and hugged her.

"Maybe so. But right now, I have you in my arms. Even if it's just as a friend. And it means the world to me right now. And that's all that matters." I kissed the top of her head. She sat there for awhile. Breathing slowly, and calming down.

"Your hearts beating fast." she said looking up, and smiling. "I remember it did that when we kissed for the first time." She put my hand to my heart, "Feel it?" I smiled at her and she smiled back. She put her head back on my chest and started talking, "I'm sorry John."

"That's all I wanted to hear."

"I'm sorry about hurting you. I'm sorry about leaving you. I'm sorry for just breaking down." she laughed and folded the letter back up, "We're going to pretend like this letter doesn't exist. And we're gonna work things out. Ok?"

I sat there for a moment. Thinking about how much I wanted her back. But also how much I didn't want to get hurt again. "Ok, but we're not dating. Not until we fix all this up and get everything back to normal."

"Ok. Sounds good." she pulled back from my arms and stood up. "I'm hungry," she laughed, "we never did eat."

I stood up and fallowed her downstairs. "What do you want?"

"Hmm," she pulled herself up on to the counter, "what about…what about just some sandwiches?"

"Sounds good," I said walking over to the pantry.

Once we finished eating I went to go make hr bed which was 2 rooms away from mine. I heard Savanna walk in the room, "I could have made my bed John," she walked towards me.

"I know but hey, you're a guest." I smiled and continued folding out the blankets. "Are these enough blankets?"

"Perfect." She said jumping on to the bed.

I stood there for a couple of second saying nothing. Just looking at her. She had a night gown on that went to her knees and her hair was up. "Well," I said walking away, "Night."

"Night John."

The thunderstorm was getting worse. The lightning lit up my room. And the thunder shook the house. I could hear the rain tapping on the roof and slamming against the window.

It was about 1 A.M when I heard footsteps in my room. I opened my eyes and leaned up.

"Oh, I'm sorry, I didn't mean to wake you John."

I rubbed my eyes and turned on the light. "What are you doing in here?"

"Well," she said standing in the middle of my bed, "I got scared…" she stood there.

I laughed, "So you wanted to come sleep with me?"

"Something like that." she said walking over to the other side of the bed.

"Ok then." I turned off the lights and she crawled in bed.

"John?"

"Hmm?"

"I love you."

"I love you too."

* * *

**Ok! So what did you think. I need to add alot to this chapter to make it better. But it's just a draft. (: Review it please!**

**~Nikki Nik~**


	3. Chapter 3

**Ok....well this chapter was sooo much longer. But i had a guy at my school delete it and i didnt save it. So this is it. Chapter 4 will take longer to be uploaded. It will be longer than them all right now. And like i say all the time, I WILL EDIT! And add more (: **

* * *

I woke up in the morning to find that Savanna was gone. The side of the bed she was sleeping on was nicely made. I rolled over and saw a note on the night stand. Letters again….

Dear John,

I feel weird writing these again. You must feel weird reading it. This is nothing bad I promise. Its now 5 A.M. I woke up an hour ago. I felt wonderful waking up by your side. Even though I wasn't supposed too. John, I'm only writing you this because I want you to know what I feel. So in order to do that, I've left. I'm going shopping and I want you to meet me at the south side of the beach, and under the bridge where we were standing yesterday at 6. No earlier and no later.

Bye, John.

I folded the letter up and tossed it on the nightstand.

It was around noon when I finally got up. I showered and made lunch. While making a sandwich in the kitchen, my doorbell rang. I dropped my knife and wiped my hands off with a paper towel, I walked over to my front door. It was unlocked from Savanna using it earlier. I opened the door and squinted my eyes as I looked at the sun.

"John!" Jake.

"What do you want?" I said in an aggravated but calm tone. Once again Jake pushed his way past me and came into my house. "Yes of course you can come in," I said in a sarcastic tone still standing at the door way.

"Hey I just want to know why the girl who broke your heart is in your house! Did you sleep with her!?"

"What? No. Well. No. Not really."

"Well then what the hell what were you doing with her?"

I let out a puff of air and a small laugh, "She came to my house the other day. She apparently found me. And she's been hanging out here for awhile. I don't know why she's here though."

Jake sat down on my couch and put his feet up on to the coffee table, "Sounds like," he said rubbing his chin, "she wants her little Jonny back." He laughed. I glared at him and then glanced down to the floor. "Don't tell me, that you still like her." I didn't answer him. "John?" I continued to stare at the ground . "John, she broke your heart man! Are you really going to let her give it a try again!?"

"Jake," I said looking up and him, "you don't know.." he cut me off before I had a chance to finish.

"John! I know her! I know her! You don't know that! I'm sorry I didn't tell you! But you were hurt and I couldn't. I just couldn't tell you…"

I stood there and felt myself getting tense, "You know her? How?"

Jake took a deep breath and started talking, "I haven't known her forever. To be honest I've only known her for a week or so. I met her at a store and I recognized her from the pictures you showed me. She got into me and then," he paused, "John do you really care?"

"Just tell me," I said starting to get furious.

He drew another breath in and looked at me, "She came over a couple nights and we hung out and talked. I wasn't in to her. Really John. I wouldn't do that to you. But anyways I started talking about you and she left and went to a coffee store about 3 blocks away from my house. Never came back. So now I'm guessing that she found you here…."

I had nothing to say. Was she really going to date Jake? Was she really in to him? He was a dirt bike rider with scares all over him. He's had at least 5 surgeries in the pat year. He almost never took a shower. The only thing that we really had in common was that we both aren't married, and we like to surf. Savanna liked the type of guy…like me. Not anywhere near Jake. "Can you please go?"

"John I told you,"

"Just. Go."

Jake stood up and shoved his way pass me. The door slammed behind him, and I continued to stand there. I walked back upstairs and went to my closet. I took out the box that contained Savanna's last letter. I opened the box and dumped everything out. My army badges landed on top. Along with a picture of a girl I started to like after Savanna left me.

Samantha was a 29 year old girl that I met after I quit the army. I was leaving the air port when I realized I forgot to call for a taxi. Samantha was standing out sitting on the bench. I was standing in front of her. "Excuse me?" She said put her head up to her head to block the sun from her eyes. "Do you need a ride?"

"Oh no, it's ok," I said pulling my new cell phone out of my pocket.

"Oh it's no problem," she grabbed my bags and walked to her car. I was debating weather I should fallow her. I watched the way she walked. Left. Right. Left. Right. I stepped off the curb and fallowed her. "See? It's ok. I don't bite." She smiled holding out her hand, "I'm Samantha."

"Hey Samantha."

"Oh do I not get your name?"

"Oh," I said itching my chest, "John." She smiled and went to the driver's side off the car

I walked over to the passengers side and stood by the door, "You don't have to do this. I can find a ride."

"Ah no. it's ok hun. " She had a strong country accent. Her words tided together and formed sounds that I had to take time to think about. "Ya gonna get in?" She was leaning over holding on to the steering wheel. I opened the door and sat down.

"Happy?" I was aggravated, but attracted to her in some way. Her hair was short black and smooth. She had blue eyes that brought out her skin tone.

"Yes," she smiled and started backing the car up. "So your from here?"

"Yea. I've been in the army and decided to quit. I need a better life."

"Aha," she said driving down a highway. "So do you have a place to stay?"

"No," I said, "but don't ask me if I want to stay with you. I don't even know you."

"Well, like I said I'm Samantha." she laughed, "did you not hear me when I said it?"

"No, I head you.." I felt uncomfortable sitting in the car with her, with someone that I didn't even know. "You can drop me off here," I said point to a gas station where my friend worked.

"No."

"Excuse me?"

"I'm not dropping you off when you have no where to go."

"My friend," cut off.

"Just come home with me. Please?" So much hesitation to yes. But I wasn't going to just sit hear and let her do what ever she wanted with me.

"Fine."

During that time that we were together, we shared very little. We had almost nothing in common. Well nothing that you could compare me and Savanna too. She hated surfing. Surfing was apart of my life. She thought the army was a waste of time. It was what made me who I am today. She hate this. I liked that. I hated this, she loved that. It lasted for about 2 weeks. Then we called it quits. I called it quits. It made no sense being with some one who never wanted to do anything with you.

I did nothing after I looked at that picture. I read through Savanna's note that she left me this morning about 10 times. Samantha meant nothing to me anymore. She really never meant anything to me. She was mainly just a girl that…I used most likely. I didn't use her in a bad way. I used her to try in hide my pain for Savanna. Even though that did nothing to help. In the end I ended up missing her more. Gazing at her picture when I was bored at home alone. Nothing else was on my mind when I did that. When my friends came over to talk about there girlfriends, Savanna came to my head. And the thoughts that I had that some day I would marry her. And instead of talking about my girlfriend, I would talk about my wife. But that never happened. I would end up sitting in my chair, listening to them talk about how wonderful she is, and how they're going to get married. When they ask me about my love life, I have nothing to say.

It was around 5, when I started getting ready. I get wondering why Savanna wanted me there at 6. No later. No earlier. Was it something important? Or was it just the fact that she wanted to see how responsible I could be? I took another shower and got dressed. I did nothing with my hair because it wasn't long enough to do anything with it really.

"5:50," I mumbled to myself getting into the car. I figured she probably forgot. But what would I know? I arrived at the beach at 5:57. I made my way over to the board walk where me and Savanna were standing last night. I saw no one over there. I kept walking and walked around the corner.

"John!" Savanna yelled letting go of Jake.

"What…" I couldn't even finish what I wanted to say. I was stunned by what I saw. Savanna was in Jake's arms. Kissing him.

"John…?" Jake said walking over to me.

"Don't touch me!" I started backing up, "I'm not kidding Jake."

"Jake!" Savanna yelled trying to pull him back, "You should listen to John."

I stared walking away, "What John? You cant face the fact that your ex loves me?"

"Love you!?" Savanna yelled slapping Jake across the face. "John, please…."

"See Savanna! Here you go again! You cant stick to one guy! You said you wanted to come back to me. Then your kissing Jake?" I paused. "Why?"

"John, it wasn't like that."

"Oh no? Then what was it?" I started getting frustrated. So did Savanna.

"John you don't understand.."

"Oh no! I understand this! What I don't understand is you Savanna!"

Savanna fell to the ground, "John,"

"Just," I started to back up, "just leave me alone. I don't know why I thought you changed."

"John, this isn't Savanna's fault. I came over here to make you mad. It had nothing to do with her." Jake's voice was getting quieter. Knowing he caused a mess.

"Just have her."

"Please don't do this John," Savanna pleaded.

I didn't answer her. I kicked the sand and walked over to the water. I had the picture of Savanna in my pocket. I always had it around with me. I looked at it one last time, then dropped it in the water.

"John! What's your problem..wait…you kept that?" I still didn't say anything to her. "Why did you keep that John?" I felt tears fill up in my eyes. I felt like I was being questioned by the police. "John?" her voice was full of worry.

"Just leave him. He doesn't deserve you anyways." Jake said leaning up against the pole. I turned around.

"No. He does. I need him. I love him. John?"

My heart broke in to a billion pieces. She hurt me twice now. And Jake? I cant even trust him anymore.

"Say something…"

I turned around and walked to her. She stood there with a red face. I kissed her check and whispered, "Bye."

* * *

**So??? What do you think? Chapter 4 should be up by the end of this month, or begging of next (: It's going to take me awhile to write it. But i hope you liked this one! It was what i could remember...So please review!!! ^^**

**~Nikki Nik~**


	4. Chapter 4

**I got this done faster than i thought i would......(: Well this one wasnt what i thought it was going to be. I had too many things to fix. BUT! Chapter 5 i swear will be dramatic and sweet!!! ^^ So i hope you like this!!!!!!! **

* * *

I never thought that this would happen. Never thought it would happen the first time. Never thought it would happen again. But it did. And it hurt worst the second time around. When I saw her kissing Jake, who apparently was my best friend, it tore me apart. Is that what she wanted me to go see? Or was Jake right? Did he really start it because I made him mad? And still, why would he do this? He knew I still loved her. What about his girlfriend. Not like he's single anyways. I still haven't gone home. I was eating at Friday Night Out. There was no one in there, except the man that worked there. He was a 60 year old man who took after his parents after they died. The restaurant opened in the late 1990s. I started coming here when I moved. Matthew was always here. He ran the bar, which was where I was today. I didn't have anything alcoholic. Couldn't bring myself to do it. Instead I just had a coke with a side of fries.

"Anything else I can get you?" Matthew said cleaning off the counter with a rag.

I shrugged my shoulders and picked up my coke, "No, this is good."

Matthew continued cleaning the counter and looked up at me, "You Ok John? You don't seem like your self." Was it really true that everyone could tell that I was hurt?

"I'm fine. Its. Nothing." My voice shook as I took a sip of pop.

"Mmm," Matthew hummed, "Well if you need me you know where I'll be." He put down his rag and walked to the back. He always went back there. I was never sure why. He was a polite man. Who knew me from bottom to top. My dad used to watch him as a kid. My dad would always talk about him. Talk about how well he listened and how polite he was. That was when my dad talked more. Still didn't pay as much attention to me as he could have.

The Diner was empty. No one was at the tables and no one was getting drunk at the bar. It was just me and my coke. I wanted to leave, but I didn't want to go home so Savanna could find me. She was the last person that I wanted to see. But her face kept playing in my head, and her voice would whisper in my ear. When I took time to think, I could feel her touch.

"Hello?" A faded voice came from the entrance of the door. I turned my head to see Savanna standing there with her face red. "John?" She started walking over to me but stopped about 4 feet away, "I'm. I'm sorry John. I didn't know he was going to do that."

I swung back around in my seat and took a drink of my soda. "Ok." That's all I could pull out.

"Is that all you can say John?"

"What do you want me to say? Do you want me to forgive you for hurting me yet again?"

"Well no. But I wanna talk."

I turned back around in my seat and looked at her. She was standing with her arms crossed and her head down. He hear was a mess and her make up was no where close to nice. "Ok. Come here." I patted on the seat next to me and let her know that she could come over. My chair swung around and I was back facing the door where Matthew went in. Savanna took a seat beside me and put her hand on my knee. "Ok so what do you want to talk about?"

"You." She said.

"Me?"

"Yes. I wanna know what you think about me. And what you think about me and you."

I huffed and moved my shoulders around. "Ok then. So remember when you sent me that letter saying that you,"

"Please don't talk about that."

"Ok then, well…Savanna. I…" I paused and looked up, holding back tears, "I love you. I just cant stop. When I found out you loved Tim, it killed me. When you were at my doorstep I felt like everything was perfect. And I thought about everything we had. And everything we still have," I started crying. I felt so weak. So…useless. I let the tears roll down my face and continued, "then I saw you kissing Jake. And…it hurt me more than Tim." I soon felt Savanna's arms around me. She kissed my check.

"Oh John. I keep messing up. And I don't why."

I couldn't bring myself to say anything. I opened my mouth and closed it. Knowing I would be huffing and gasping for air if I talked. I didn't touch Savanna. I didn't want her to touch me. "Sa," was all I could get out. My face was turning red from the tears. I felt terrible. I don't cry. I kept reminding myself that.

"Huh," Savanna took a deep breath in and began to talk, "I know Jake. I met him,"

"I know," I cried. "Please I don't wanna talk about it. Go back to him. Go." Savanna pulled away.

"Who are you John?! Your not the John I know!"

"Your not the Savanna I thought I loved." I knocked my soda down and stormed out the door. Ever since Savanna came back in to my life, it's been nothing but drama and tears coming from one of us. I couldn't share the love and all I had for her if I did was get mad at her. Nothing was right anymore.

I got in to my car and sat there. Savanna still hadn't came out to get me. To apologize. I wanted to wait. But a part of me was saying I should go. Go home and forget her. And that's exactly what I did.

When I got home I went to my room. The door slammed behind me and shook the house. I sat on my bed and cried. Cried over everything. Mainly Savanna. My life was getting better, until she came back. Once she came back everything went down. I still remember last night when she said she loved me. And she held me close. I felt her skin against mine I felt perfect again. Then Jake. Jake came over and screwed everything up. And chose not to tell me that he knew her. My phone rang a thousand times while I was in the room. I figured it was Savanna. Or Jake. So I wouldn't dare answer it.

When I finally got tired on my phone ringing, I went down stairs to answer it. It was a number I didn't know.

"Hello?"

"Hi, umm is this John Tyree?"

"Yes, who is this?"

"Alan." A long pause broke between the phone and it was silent.

"Alan? Tim's Alan?"

"Can I come over?"

Alan was at my house about an hour after we hung up. He was taller. He had lighter hair than before. And his skin was darker. Must be from riding horses all day. He was in a blue Hollister shirt with shorts on. I gazed upon his features as he stood at my door step, "Alan."

"John." he smiled at me and looked down, "may I come in?"

I opened the door wider and allowed him to walk in. His steps were in rhythm with the clock. He sandal's flipped behind him as he took a step. He swung around and looked at me. "So Alan. You're here because?" I walked through the kitchen to fallow him. By the time I saw him he was already sitting in the chair that I normally sit in. I moved over to the couch to be nice. Alan sat so proper. Back straight and shoulders up. He was leaning back in the chair though rocking.

"Savanna called me this morning and said that she found you. And then she called me about an hour ago. She was happy in the morning, and then I was lucky if I could understand what she was saying."

"Mmm," I said putting my hands behind my head. I could tell it was going to be a long night with a long conversation coming. Talking about how wrong I was to walk out on her. And how I was wrong to leave. And say good-bye. But she did nothing wrong. I would end up getting some lecture like that. Something to make me feel like I complete jerk. So I sat back, I listened to everything that he said. Word by word. Minute by minute.

It was about 9 when he left. I felt like a jerk, like I knew he would make me feel. I got back in my car and drove down to the pier. I parked at Friday Nights Out and stood in the parking lot. It was empty. But the neon lights flashed in the window indicating that beer was sold in there. I walked up to the door and it was still unlocked. Usually Matthew would have closed up by now. But he didn't. I walked inside to see no one. Not even Matthew. I walked around one corner and still saw no one. I continued to walk over to the pool table to see Savanaa sitting alone at a booth looking out the window. I walked over to her and sat next to her. "I'm sorry."

"What?" She lifted her head up and it was red from tears.

"Savanna, I said I'm sorry. And I love you more than anything in the world. And I was a jerk. And….God I just miss you."

Savanna smiled then looked down. "John, John, John." She calmly said my name then reached for my head, "I was hoping you were going to say something like that."

"Well," I paused standing up, "I did, and you need to come home with me so you can sleep."

She stood up and I took her hand. I felt so much better about everything. It felt like I never even saw her kissing Jake. I felt like she never wrote me that letter saying that she loved Tim. Tim. I bet she still loved him. I knew she missed him. But how much. Was it enough that she could hurt me without even knowing it? Enough to make me cry every day? It was enough to make me say it was "no big deal" and to hold on to her while I have her again. Even though while on the inside, I could tell that I would lose her once more. Lose her to a guy that would treat her like a queen and would do anything for her. Is that me?

When we go home she went on her way to go shower. She decided that she was going to sleep in a different room tonight. Which was fine, even though I wanted to feel her against me once more. I sat down stairs in the kitchen while she showered. The sink was dripping in the back ground which blocked me from thinking. Savanna wasn't that girl. She wasn't that person. She was Savanna. The Savanna that I loved and cared about so much. But during these past two days, something would go wrong. Something went wrong in the end. As much as I loved her and wanted to hold on to her forever, the thought kept coming back in to my mind that she would leave me again. Leave me for Jake. Most likely. Then I would have? No one.

My phone rang in the back ground while I was thinking. I glanced over and saw it blinking. Red. Red. Red. Red. I stood up and walked to it.

"Hello?"

"John?"

"Who is this?" the voice sounded faintly like Jake. But more shaken.

"Really John?"

"Jake?" I laughed, "sure doesn't sound like you."

"Shut up. Ok? Is Savanna there?" and there it was. Being hurt for the final strike and the hit out.

"What's it to you?"

"I just wanna apologize John. I didn't know how much she meant to you.."

"Yes you did…" I hung up the phone and slammed it on to the table. _Idiot_. I murmured to myself. I walked out of the kitchen to see Savanna standing at the bottom with her arms crossed.

"Who was that?"

I grunted and looked at her. "No one. Can I just go to bed?" I shoved past her and went to my room. I got the feeling that she would think that I was mad at her again. I wasn't. I was mad at Jake and how stupid he could be. "Savanna?" I opened my door and walked out there. "I'm sorry." I wrapped my arms around her and she kissed my arm.

"For?"

"Being all mad just a second ago. Jake is just stupid. He's an idiot."

"Aha," she laughed and pulled away. "Is that what you really think of him? He said you two were good friends."

"Yea we "were". Not anymore."

"Ah." she paused and looked at the clock. "It's almost midnight. We should go to bed."

"Ok," I kissed the top of her head and smiled, "sleep good." I walked away. I couldn't say I loved her. Even though I did, more than anything that was on this planet. But after what happened today, it seemed like it was the wrong thing to say. The wrong time to say it.

I woke up around 8. The smell of bacon and eggs woke me up. I quick hopped in the shower and got dressed. Walking down the stairs I could her Savanna singing a country song. Just like the type of girl that she was. She was still in her night gown and her hair was put up into a pony tail. She was flipping eggs and spinning around. I let out a quiet laugh and she turned around.

"John!?" she put backed up to the counter. "I didn't hear you wake up! Oh my, now I feel stupid." she laughed.

"It was cute." I smiled, "What are you making?"

"Eggs, bacon, and pancakes. You hungry?"

"Starving."

"Well there's plenty of food." she pointed to the table that was filled with food.

"Can I wait for you to eat? I kinda want to eat with you."

She reached to the stove and turned the burner off. Dropping the rag on the counter she turned to me. "Ok then." She sat down in the chair next to me and looked at the table, "Oh! Plates and forks would be nice." She rose from her seat and walked back over to the stove where the dished were laying.

"You do good."

She smiled and gave me a plate and a fork. "Here you go."

"So why did you cook this?"

"Because I wanted to find a way to say I'm sorry for hurting you. I didn't mean,"

"In the past?"

"Sure," she smiled and reached her hand out, "in the past."

After breakfast Savanna went upstairs to go get ready. I sat on the couch and flipped through the TV channels. Animal Planet. Weather Channel. Disney Channel. Nick Toon's. Nothing I really wanted to watch. I turned off the TV and yelled up the stairs for Savanna. She looked down and smiled, "Can you not wait?" She laughed and walked down. I smiled and brushed her hair back.

"So, what are we doing today? Nothing that involves us fighting please?" I joked.

"You'll see." She smiled and pulled me out the door, "Oh, and I'm driving us there."

She took the keys from me as we started out the door. With her driving I felt like I had no control on where we were going. I had no idea where she was taking me. But it looked somewhere familiar. The beach was calm and the waves crashed against the shores as the surfers tried to catch them. There was a pier that looked like the one where I first met Savanna. I looked over to my right to see the beach house that her and he friends stayed at while there were working on the house a couple years ago. She pulled up to the drive way and stopped the car. I sat there in confusion, "This is what you had in mind?"

She got out of the car and ran to the house. Ignoring me in the matter. "Mmkay," I said to myself while opening up the door. I heard Savanna's name being screamed from a mix of boys and girls. I walked up to her and took her hand. Her friends eyed me and grinned.

"John." One girl said pulling Savanna closer to her. She whispered something in Savanna's ear and pulled her inside. I could already tell that something wasn't going to go right here. It was a bad idea to bring me here. Bring me to people that despise me. Want nothing to do with me. And probably hated Savanna for moving right back on to me once Tim died. I was left alone at the door step. Everyone was inside. So I turned around and headed from Dave's Surf Rental.

* * *

**Well???????????? (: Chapter 5 I have a date to post it because im already working on it. So it will be up May 1st! Thats a saturday!!!! (((: So i hope you all liked it!!! Review please ^^ and if you have any suggestions please tell me!!! Id love to hear them!**


	5. Chapter 5

**Huh..Ok! here it is. Like i say every single time, i WILL go back in the end and ADD more and EDIT! (: But i hope you like this. I changed it like 6 times to make it sounds perfect...ish ^^ Read and please review!!!**

* * *

"Hey John! Sure haven't seen you in a while!" Alec said leaning up against the counter. He opened a surf shack about a year after I got back from the army. He was a young guy. 18 when he opened the shack. He was about 19 now and was finishing up college. He had black spiked hair and was pretty tall. The way he looked at you made you feel like you had something wrong with you.

"I know." I side smiling getting closer to the counter. "How have you been?"

"Oh you know. School. This. Girls!" He laughed hitting my shoulder."What about you? Have you found that special someone yet?"

"Special? More like she's in to hurting me than she it liking me."

"Sounds like someone is having love issues. I know this guy who is extremely hot and knows-"

"Alec, I don't need your help," I smiled and patted his back. "Can I just rent a surf board please?" I threw a 20 on the counter and waited for Alec to get the hint that I was aggravated.

"Here ya go." he said sliding the surf board over the counter. I took the board and walked towards the water. The exact same water where I taught Savanna how to surf. Sometimes I wish I never met Savanna. It would have saved me so much pain. I could probably be married and happy and not worries about being hurt every day. I sat in the sand and took my shirt off. The waves would brush against my feet. I picked up the surf board and walked in the water. The cold water reminded me of the days where all I had to worry about was my dad and the army. Nothing else. I reached the part of the water where I couldn't stand. I floated in the water with my head laying on the board. I had no energy to do anything. I bobbed in the water as the waves pushed me in then back out. My eyes were closed and I imagined how everything would be right now if I never met her. The thoughts pulled through my head as I lay on the board. Why did Savanna mean so much to me? How could I love her when all I do is die for her? Her kindness used to spark me when ever I would touch her. And her words would play again and again in my head. That was when I actually wanted to be around her. Never leaving her side.

"Hey! There you are!" I heard a faded voice off in to the shore. I wanted to turn my head to look, but couldn't bring my head to look. "John?-"

"What?" I floated around and saw Savanna standing half way in the water. Her shorts were short enough that they didn't touch the water. Her face looked wet in the distance. "Savanna?!" I jumped off the board and swam till my feet could touch the ground. I dashed towards her and wrapped my arms around her. What was I thinking? I love her. No matter how much pain and stress she causes me. "Savanna," I kissed her cheek and looked at her. "what's wrong?"

"Is it true?" she stood there slouching.

"Is what true? What happened in that house?" I pointed to the house off in the distance. Savanna pulled away from me and crossed her arms. "Oh my-"

"Be quiet!" Savanna snapped back and fell to the ground.

I drew in a breath, "Savanna, this is getting old. I'm getting tired of fighting with you everyday. It's a non stop thing between us now. You always have something wrong and I cant figure it out. If your going to keep making everything more dramatic! Whether its about your family or your damn emotions for Tim! Right now Savanna, I think I'm your rebound from Tim! Go back to Alan. Go live with your idiotic friends! But if your gonna keep treating me like this and crying every damn day then I'm done with everything that has to do with you!" I started walking out to the water to retrieve my surf board.

"Where you going!?" She yelled back at me and started to fallow.

"To get my board. Is that a problem?"

When I got out to the water I looked back over to Savanna who was sitting in the sand waiting for me. I got back to shore and dropped the board and sat by here side. "Would you tell me what's really wrong?"

"Brittney said that you were with someone late last night." She paused and looked at me, "Is it true?"

"Ha!" I laughed and stretched out, "I was asleep. You do notice your friends all hate me, and they'll do anything to make you believe I'm a terrible guy. This includes lies Savanna."

"I know, I'm sorry for even thinking that you would do something like that." She leaned over to me and laid her head on my shoulder. I gazed up at the moon that was rising from the ocean. Full moon tonight. Full moon… "Hey Savanna," I took her hand and put it up to the moon, "Guess what tonight is?" I smiled and put her hand down.

"Full moon. God John, so many memoires," she smiled at grabbed my hand.

I smiled back at her, "I remember sitting outside when it was a full moon. And I would think of you, and think about how great it would soon feel to be back by your side."

The days in the army where I would sneak out of the camp and lay in a field and gaze at the moon. My thumb would always fit perfectly and it would remind me of the first say I met Savanna. Her inviting me over to dinner and I met Tim for the first time. Then we got to know each other and hung out every day that we could. When it came time for me to leave I thought that she would lose everything that she had for me. I made a promise that I would come home again to see her. To be with her. A promise that I would love her and only her. That I would marry her one day and have a family and grow old together. The promise of a life time of happiness and nothing else. A promise to come back to her side. When I retrieved that last letter, she broke the promise. While I hung on to it. Her picture was in my pocket everyday, as if it was a lucky charm. Even though she wasn't mine anymore.

Losing Savanna made it hard to talk to the guys in the army. They would always talk about how their girlfriend is at home waiting for them. Or carrying their child. Or that they were getting married when he returned. They would ask me about Savanna, and what my plans are for her.

"So John, you and Savanna gonna tie the loop?"

"No.." I would cross my arms every time someone would ask me that. I think I did it so much to the point where they would notice that it bothered me when they asked me that. Which it did. Knowing that everyone else was getting a move on with life and having a family and marrying their high school sweet heart made me sick. I never thought I would see Savanna again. Till the day I got back and saw her. Saw Tim, and then left.

"John."

"Yea?"

"What if we got married?"

My heart stopped and I sat up. "Then we would. I guess."

"Aha," she said standing up.

"Why do you ask?"

"No reason at all."

"You sure?" I sat there stretching out again.

"Yea."

I yawned and looked at her, "Ok then."

I sat there wondering why she would ask something like that. She already knew that I would do anything to marry her. But she left me for Tim. What if she was just saying that so she could hide her pain?

The next morning, Savanna went off to go find a job. I sat at home looking through the papers to find a jewelry store.

"Dave's Diamond Ring." I mumbled to myself as I saw a sale in the paper. I got ready and headed over to the store.

"Hello sir. Can I help you with anything?" A young man about the age of 30 walked up to me and stood in a proper posture. His name tag said Hunter on it. He was nicely cleaned up, and his smile was warm and welcoming.

"Yes, I think you can."

"Well," he said starting to walk away, I fallowed close behind him, "We have diamonds, rubies, pearls, wedding rings. Male wedding rings. What are you looking for today?" He stopped in front of a counter and put his hand on it.

"Do you have any thing for engagement?"

The young man smiled, "Fallow me," he started walking to the back of the store and went to a door, "Here you go. Just call me if you have any questions." He left me alone in there and I looked at the rings. On one shelf, there was single diamond rigs. The nest shelf, and more diamonds on them, and another shelf had colored diamonds. I picked one up and looked at it. It was navy blue. Not much of a romantic color. I put it down and turned around to the single diamond rings. They went up by size and shape.

"Damn it," I said reaching in to my pocket. I pulled my phone out and dialed Savanna's number. It went through 2 rings before I hung up. I cant call her. Then she'll know what I'm doing. I dropped my phone back in my pocket and picked up a single diamond ring that had a diamond in the shape of a heart. It reminded me of Savanna. I walked out with it and went to the checkout counter. "Hello?" I said holding the ring in my hand.

"Can I help you?" An older man walked out from behind a certain with his hands in his pockets. He took the ring from my hand and looked around at it. "Is this it for you?"

"How much does it cost?"

"Ok, I'll get this in a bag for you."

"No wait," I said grabbing his arm, "How much does it cost?"

He spun around and examined the ring. "How much are you willing to pay for it?"

"I choose my price?"

"Yes. It's costumer's choice. We make the ring, you name the price."

"Mm," I said looking at the old man, "25,000?

"Sounds good sir. Would you like to but a loan on that or would you like to do an extended pay plan?"

"Extended I guess,"

"Ok," he bent down under the counter, and came back up with a clipboard and about 5 pieces of paper. "If I can just have you fill these out," he flipped through the papers, "and sign here, here, here, and initial here and here." He gave me the clipboard and took the ring to the room that was behind the counter.

I sat down and looked at the papers. Was I really ready do this? Was I really ready to marry Savanna? After all the crap she put me through it was a hard choice to make. We just started talking again, after almost 3 years. Its been 3 days and I'm sure as anything that she still loves Tim. And isnt ready to move on. Holding these papers made me shake. I didn't want her to say she wasn't ready, or just run away and never talk to me again. How could I do this? What was I thinking. I stood up with only 1 page filled out. I went back up to the counter and the guy came over with a box.

"Ok, here you go. Did you finish the papers?" I looked at the box and thought about how beautiful it was. Wrapped to show nothing but a small box.

"No," I walked back to the chair and sat back down. There as a younger man sitting by me filling out papers too. He looked nervous the way that he was holding the pen."Getting married?" I asked looking down at my papers.

"Huh?" he looked up.

"You getting married?"

"Oh, yea. I'm kinda nervous about it."

I smiled and patted his back, "I'm sure you'll do fine." I looked back down at my papers and signed one last time. I stood up and looked at the guy again. Only think how happy he must be to marry someone he loves. I got back to the counter and gave the old man the clipboard. "Here you go."

He took the board and flipped through the papers then went over to the register. He entered some numbers in to the cash register and looked up at me, "Is this all I can do for you?"

"Uhh," I clenched my hands in to fists and got tense, "How am I going to do this?"

He smiled and walked around the counter and came over to my side, "What ever you want. Listen," he put his hand on my back, "If this girl really loves you, then she will not care how you propose to her. Just do it in private and at a random time." He walked back to the register, "And then you'll get her," he handed the box over the counter and smiled, "Good luck."

I walked out of the store and went to my car. I sat there for about 5 minutes until I finally got the nerve to go home.

It was about 7 when I got home. The light was on in the house as I pulled up to the drive way. I walked in to the house and looked around. No Savanna. I went in to the kitchen to see Savanna reading the paper. She had a cup of tea by her side and her hair was up. Alone and random, I thought to myself while looking at her.

"Oh John!" she laughed putting the paper down and put her hand to her heart, "You scared me! I didn't know you were home already." She stood up and walked over and kissed me. "What's in the box?"

I looked down and notice I was still holding on to the box."Be right back," I ran upstairs and unwrapped it. It was still in its original box. I looked at it and felt the need to pass out. I walked back down the stairs to see Savanna in the same position that I left her in."Savanna," I walked up to her and took her hand. The light in the kitchen was perfect and the candle she had lit on the stove gave the romantic effect. Her hand was smooth and soft. She looked down at me and I looked down. I wanted to give up. I never thought proposing would be this hard.

"John?"

"Wait," I said still standing with her hand in mine. The box was in the back pocket and I bent down. "Savanna," I paused again. That was all that could come out of me. She glanced a smile at me and looked at the candle that was flickering in the background. "Savanna," I said one last time, "Will you," I took a breath and pulled put the ring and put it on her hand, "Marry me?"

* * *

**^^ So? Is it good? What should i add? What should Savanna say? Review please! If you have any suggestions dont be shy! Tell me! i will EDIT it and ADD more! So give me ideas!!!!!! Thanks!!!! ^.^**


	6. Chapter 6

**I feel some what accomplished =P Well here you guys go! I hope you like it. I will go back and edit and add more. Once i finish the story though ^^ I really hope you like it! Please review!!!!!!!!**

"I-" she stumbled across her words as she looked down at me, "I don't know what to say John," She pulled away and backed up in to the counter, "Damn it!" She screamed as she put her hand to her back.

I stood up from the floor with the ring still in my hand, "I knew it," I walked around the kitchen and slammed my hand on the table, "I knew it, I knew it! Damn!" I walked around the kitchen and looked at her, "Ok, ok. You know what Savanna? Have it!" I threw the ring on the ground and walked away. I went up stairs and slammed my door. I knew it would happen. I knew I would end up wasting money on something that would have no effect on me. She pretty much said no. Savanna her self asked "what if we got married?" I answered it. And attempted to do it. But I get a, "I don't know what to say John" type of answer. If she so called "loved" me, then why didn't, why couldn't she marry me? She wanted to when we were in love 2 years ago. When we would sit on the beach and talk about our future together. When I would go pick her up and we would go to a restaurant that she ended up loving in the end. Where I would take her home and she would talk to my dad about coins. The time where I actually heard him talk about something. Something other than how my day went and how he wanted to know what was going on with me and Savanna. Then Savanna studied him. And thought he had autism. And maybe he did, but it wasn't her job to point it out. The times where we would sit together on the beach and hold each other close. Those times where I didn't want her to ever disappear. Now, I could really care less.

I could hear Savanna talking on the phone to someone. I laid down on my bed and closed my eyes. Nothing was working out. What more could I do?

My phone rang in my pocket. I pulled it out and looked at it, "Ugh," I flipped my phone open and answered it, "Hello?"

"Hello, my name is James Patterson. I'm with the US navy."

"Keep talking," I said sitting up on my bed.

"Well we need a bright strong young man and you seem to fight the place. Would you be interested?"

"Where would this be located?"

"We are located off of California. You would be able to go home every other month and get a pay while not at work. We can give you a week to decide. But after that we have to pass the job on." He paused and started talking again, "This is a great opportunity John."

"Well thank you," I said holding the phone in my hand while breathing calmly. "I'll get back to you on that one." I hung up the phone and walked out the door. When I got to the stairs I saw Savanna twirling the ring around in her fingers. She sat in a sad posture. Her back was slouched and her head was down.

"You know what John?" she said with her head still down.

"How did you know I was here?" I walked down the steps and sat by her side.

"Heard you talking in the room to someone. And then you slammed your door coming out of your room. You have heavy breathing John." I sat there and looked at the ground. "That's not it though. Do you know what I'm talking about?"

"Mmm," I said shuffling my hands together, "No,"

"I mean," she paused and looked at the ring, "Yes," she slipped the ring on her finger and looked at me with her puffy red face. She cried again obviously.

I smiled and looked down, "I got a call,"

"What? Your not going to answer to the marrying thing? Your going to respond with, you got a call?"

"Listen," I put my hand on her knee, "I got a call from a guy named James Patterson. He offered me a job in the navy. And-"

"In the what?!" she cut me off and stood up, "John, no you cant. I wont let you! What did you tell him?"

"Nothing," I paused, "Yet,"

"So there's still a chance that you will go?" She rocked back and forth with the ring on her finger.

"Maybe. But if we're getting married, then-"

"You wont go?" she responded to me, her voice shaky.

"Never said that,"

"You didn't have to…"

I sat there for awhile looking at the ring on her finger. The finger that once held Tim's ring of love. Now holds mine is his place, "It has amazing pay and if we have kids-"

"We're not having any damn kids if your leaving John!"

"But I'm not going," I responded to her yell in a calm voice.

She stood there holding back tears and fighting with herself, "Ok."

Later that night Savanna went out to get food from the store. I decided to stay home and think. The job I passed up. Getting married. Kids? All these things were making no sense. What if I married Savanna and it turned out to be a disaster? What if we fight every day and we grow tired of each other? What if we had a family?

I picked up the phone and grabbed my cell to look up a number, "Kate, Kate, Kate," I mumbled to myself while flipping through the phone, "Ahh,"

I dialed the number and sat through the ring. Ring. Ring. After ring.

"Hey you've reached Kate and I can't get to the phone, so leave a message and I'll get back to you."

"Hey umm Kate," I started talking and looked at the ground, "I'm not sure if your busy tomorrow or not, but if you aren't then can you please call me back? On my cell phone if you will. It would be more protective. Thanks Kate." I hung up the phone and leaned back in the chair. Headlights shun in through the window as Savanna pulled up in the drive way. She came in with about 5 bags and walked in to the kitchen.

"Hey," I said standing up and walking over to the kitchen, "When?"

"Huh?" She replied while putting the items away.

"When do you want to get married?" I crossed my arms and glanced at her hand again, "Doesn't have to be anytime soon, I just want an idea."

She turned around and looked at me, "I want a kid first." She leaned back on the counter and grinned.

"A kid? You mean? We make one?" I joked around and walked over to her, "You want one before we get married? Before we start off your life together?"

"I just think it would be smart. We can build up your relationship a little more and fix the bumps in the road. It would just make sense."

"Mmhmm," I said looking in to her eyes. I got lost. They were like a maze. Leading in one way and then turning around to go another. Leading me back to where I started. "When?"

"Now,"

The next morning, I felt tired a dizzy. I felt as if someone took me and spun me around in circles a thousand times. Savanna was still sleeping on my side. After that everything that happened last night, I'm not shocked to see her tired. I pulled myself out of bed, trying not to wake her. I walked to the bathroom and hopped in the shower. Thoughts of last night played over and over in my head. Reminding me of what I had before. What I did before. Before she left me to fend on my own. To live without the girl that I love, and to live knowing that the girl that I loved left me. The warm water fell down my back and dripped in the drain. I shut off the shower and stepped out. I felt the bathroom not doing anything to my hair and sliding only my shorts and shirt back on. I walked down stairs and walked over in to the living room. What if I'm not ready to be a father? What if I'm not ready to be responsible for the things that a father has to do for his child. What if Savanna leaves me and the child? Or takes it away from me? Leaves me alone again? The idea of knowing that soon Savanna would find out if she was pregnant or not killed me. She had to wait a week to test for it. The longest week of my life would be heading my way. The pain of knowing if she has it, or doesn't. The truth of the fact is that I wasn't ready to be a father. I wasn't ready to wake up every 4 hours of the day to go tend to its needs. To go change its diaper or feed it. I wasn't ready to have to worry every day of my life whether Savanna was going to leave me.

"Common John, you can do it," my dad cheered me on when I got my first bike. He pushed my down the road with my helmet, elbow pads and knee pads on. Him standing right behind me laughing at my struggling pain. He let go and let to peddle on my own, "There you go John! Don't stop!" He yelled to me as I steered away. My brown hair hid from the wind that was slapping against my face.

"I'm doing it dad! I'm doing it!" I yelled back looking behind me.

"Watch where your going John!" Were the last words that my dad yelled to me before I was hit by a car. The bike flew out from under me and got ran over. I skidded across the ground, scraping my sides as I went along. My dad came running up to me and picked me up. Dashed me to the house where you sat me down on the couch. He ran upstairs to grab the first-aid, only to come back down to see me laughing while looking at the cuts on my body. "Johnny boy? You Ok? You took quit the hit back there."

I chuckled at him and lifted up my shirt, "The cut looks so awesome dad!" He patted me on the head and went to work. From that point on he thought of me as a tough boy. A strong boy who was able to handle anything. When I turned 13 and was in 8th grade, my dad put me into football. He decided he wanted me to get a taste of what all the real boys do. He wanted me to go pro in that. He would give me talks every night about how strong I would become and how proud he was of me. When I hit high school, he wanted me to try every sport that the school offered. I turned him down. Most likely causing the silence that we had between each other. He continued to grow on coin collecting. Continued to live in his own world and fallow the same routine everyday. Leaving off to is sudden death.

Its been 1 week. Savanna woke up at 4 A.M and ran to the bath room. I sat up in bed and watched her dash out of the room. I turned on the light and stood up. I walked over to the bathroom door and stood there, "You Ok Savanna?" I knocked on the door.

"Mhmm," She replied with her voice skipping. I could feel my heart beating in my chest and the blood rushing around my body. I felt like my body was over heating. I backed up against the wall and fell to the ground. My hands shook and the body ached. What was happening? Knowing Savanna was going to find out if she was pregnant or not killed me. I could hear her gasping for air.

Then everything seemed to come to a stop. I stood up. It was quite in there. I walked over to the door and tapped on it, "Savanna? Baby?" Nothing. No response. I put my head to the door and heard Savanna's breathing come to a steady stop. The pressure on me built up. I paced around the door waiting for her to come out. "Savanna? You Ok?" I knocked on the door one last time.

"John!" She yelled to me. I opened the door and walked in. She was standing by the sink looking at the tester. "John. John. John." She repeated over and over again. She lifted her head up and looked at me, "John…I'm pregnant." She smiled at me and looked down to the ground. "I cant believe it John. We're….We're going to have a kid John. We're going to have a family."

I backed out of the bathroom, saying nothing to her. I went back in to the room and sat down on the bed.

"John?" Savanna walked in and sat by my side, "Aren't you happy?"

"I'm happy Savanna," I took her hand and looked at her, "But what if I turn out to be like my dad? I don't want to be like that. I want to be a good father. Not that my dad wasn't a good dad, but I want to interact with my child. I want to grow with them and communicate with them," my eyes filled with tears and I looked at Savanna, "I don't want my kid to have to go through the pain to see me die and know that the relationship between us could have been stronger. And that I paid more attention to him, and not my hobby. I love my dad. I miss him Savanna. I just wish," I paused and took a breath, "I just wish we could have had a stronger relationship."

Savanna put her head on my shoulder, "John, your going to make a great father."

"You think so?"

"John," she laughed, "I know so."

"John," she laughed, "I know so."

I kissed he check and looked at her. The thoughts ran through my mind of how I got so lucky to have a girl that cared about me enough to say that I was going to be a great dad. "Should be start designing the room?" I asked.

"No," she responded putting her hand to her stomach, "I want to know what it is first."

"It's too early isn't?"

She smiled, "Yes. But I want to build a room that is perfect for the baby."

I patted her leg, "If that's what you want."

"I have what I want now John."

**Good? Bad? Ok? (: I really hope you guys liked it! If you have ANY ideas of what should happen next please tell me!!!! I want to know! Should it be a boy or a girl? When should they get married? ^.^ I would love to hear from you guys! So review or send me a personal message to my email! . Thank you guys for reading it and reviewing it! its was keeps me going!!! **

**~Nikki Nik~ **


	7. Chapter 7

**(((: Its a.....!!! Gotta read! John makes a tough choice here. And now...well ill explain once you read!!!!! ((:**

"Is she ok?"

"Yes sir. She's fine. Just give the doctor about 10 minutes. Then your free to go in." The nurse looked at the her clip board and walked away.

I looked at the door where Savanna was giving birth to our baby. She wanted no one to be in there except the doctor and the nurse that needed to be in there. I walked around in circles until the doctor slipped out the door, "Can I go in now?" I walked to him

He opened the door and smiled, "You may." I walked in and he shut the door behind me. In front of me, lay Savanna and the baby girl laying in her arms. She looked down at the baby and looked up at me. I stepped closer to her but stopped about 3 feet away.

"Wanna hold her?" Savanna smiled.

I walked closer and took the baby from her arms. It was so light and carless. It sat in my arms not moving, on the steadiness of its breathing. Its face was so small and beautiful. Her eyes were closed and he arms clenched together. She had her mothers face. "What are we naming her?" I looked over to Savanna.

"You pick." She smiled at me putting her hands behind her head. "She's your baby girl. And she's going to grow up to be a daddies girl. So you might as well pick."

I look down at her. What would I name her? "Alyssa…" I smiled and kissed her. "Is that good?"

"Its beautiful John."

"You pick the middle name."

She crossed her arms and lifted her head back, "Mmm," she closed her eyes and her facial expressions changed. I smiled and walked over to sit down with Alyssa. "Darla."

"Alyssa Darla…" I stopped and looked up at Savanna.

"Tyree." She answered.

I handed the baby back to Savanna and went out of the room to find a doctor. Alyssa Darla Tyree. My child. My baby girl. I have a kid now. My own kid.

Once I found the doctor, I went home to make sure the baby's bedroom was ready. It was jungle themed. The crib had lions and hippos on it. There was a rocking chair in the corner next to the closet. The night stand had a picture of Savanna and me on it. On the wall there was birds and a giraffe. There was a spot that had room for her pictures and anything that we could use to remind us of our first child.

1 week and a half later, Alyssa came home. She was bigger than she was when I last saw her. While I was away from Savanna, I was looking for a job to hold while we had the child. I filled out an application at the store down the road from us. It was all that I could find. They were concerned about hiring me due to the economy. Jobs were tight. So was money.

After 2 weeks of waiting for a job to come back to me, I gave up. Alyssa was growing in front of my eyes and I knew that when she grew up she would be as beautiful as her mom.

"Savanna, what are we going to do about money? You cant go back to work because you have to watch Alyssa. I cant feed her." I joked around as I sat down next to Savanna.

"John," She put her hand on my knee, "there's really only one thing left to do…" she took in a breath and tilted her head back, "You have to go to the navy. It's the only thing….left." her voice shook and she took in a deep breath.

"No, Savanna, I cant leave you and Alyssa. I wanna watch my baby girl grow up."

"And you will," she responded to me, "but we need this money." We sat in silence for awhile until Savanna said something, "Just call that guy and ask him about it. If hes still looking for someone. And if so then John you need to go. Me and Alyssa will be fine."

"I just…." I paused and stood up, "I don't want to risk losing you again Savanna. I lost you once. I'm-"

"You wont lose me. I promise. When you look up at the moon, know that I'm right by your side and always will be. John, you have to promise me, that no matter what happens from now on, we'll be together. And that you'll always love me."

"Ok," I started walking away then turned back, "I promise." Just like before.

"USA Navy how may I help you?"

"May I speak to James Patterson please?"

"Please hold." I got transferred over to the tiring elevator music. Then silence.

"This is James Patterson, how my I help you?"

"James," I said rubbing my hand on my knee, "This is John Tyree."

"Ah yes. John. How may I help you today?"

"Do you still have any opening for a job?"

"Umm," he said and I got hear him typing on the computer, "As a matter of fact, we do. We have one that starts next week and goes in too April. Would you be interested?"

"Well yes. But I will get to come home for a month and see my family. Right?"

"We plan that out so that way yes you can. But something's may come up."

"But I still get to see them for a month?"

"Yes," he paused, "Does this mean we have a good man on the job?"

"You bet."

Next week came around. I was standing outside my house holding Savanna and Alyssa. When I got back, she would be almost 3 months. She got bigger and was already learning to interact with many things. Savanna held on to me tight, "Now John," she said pulling something out of her pocket, "Here" She handed me a piece of paper and smiled, "Don't read it until you get on the bus Ok?"

"Ok," I put the letter in my pocket and leaned in to kiss her one last time, "I love you." I started walking away when she yelled after me.

"John! Wait!" She walked up to my side and kissed me, "Be strong."

I got on the bus and watched Savanna and Alyssa get smaller and smaller. Soon disappearing from all sight. I started to get tears in my eyes when I remembered that Savanna gave me a piece of paper. I reached in to my pocket and pulled it out. I opened it up and a picture of Savanna, Alyssa and I fell out. I looked at it. Alyssa was looking directly at the camera. Staring off in to space. I was next to Savanna with my arm around her. Her smile lit up the picture and made everything ever more perfect. I looked at the piece of paper, and noticed the first 5 words, "Dear John, I miss you," I looked at the letter. Holding my breath before I began reading it,

Dear John, I miss you,

You haven't left me yet. But by the time you read this, you will have. And I know you are missing your daughter. But me and her will do fine. I promise. John, I'm writing this in the dead night in Alyssa's room. She's so calm when she sleeps. Reminds me of you. She had your eyes John. And when I look at them, I'm going to think of you. And every night, I will look up at the moon. Full or not. And I will think of how much I love you. And how I still hate myself for ever leaving you. John, there's something that I have to tell you. When I left you for Tim, I felt a part of me go away. When I was in his arms, they didn't hold me like yours did. When I kissed him, I didn't get that magical feeling from him that I did you. And now John, everything that we do together is ever more romantic. And it makes me feel like I can do anything. And through this next month, Alyssa will grow, and I'll fall more in love with you. John be strong out there. There's no one better than you. I love you John. Write back if you can. Alyssa misses you! We cant wait to see you again! I will never leave you again John. So don't worry. Remember our promise.

Love you forever,

Savanna.

I arrived at the dock the next day. We boarded the plane in Tennessee. Savanna's letter kept replaying in my head. I put thee photo of her and Alyssa in my jacket. As my good luck charm. The men where standing in a line waiting to get orders on what to do. I walked past them and they watched me. I stepped slowly and listened to my boots hit ground. I walked in to a small office and sat down in a chair. It was a good 10 minutes before a man came in.

"Hello," he said walking right past me looking at papers.

"Hi I'm-"

"John Tyree," he put his papers on the desk and sat down, "I'm James Patterson." he reached out his hand and smiled.

"Nice to finally meet you."

"Same to you. Ok John," he turned to his computer and shook the mouse, "Ok well John, looking at your records, you will be staying," he paused and smiled, "You will be located here training new incomers. You will be rooming with Derek Laney, in room A78." he smiled a turned back around facing me.

"Ok," I stood up and grabbed my stuff, "I still get to go home next month right?"

"We do the best that we can."

I walked out of the room and went looking for my room. My boots hit the ground with power when I finally came to room A78. I opened the door and saw no one in there. I walked in and went over to a bed on the left side of the room. I dropped my suit case and sat down on the bed. Closing my eyes and putting my head between my head I got images of Savanna in my head. Her standing with Alyssa in her arms while I drove away. The tears rolled down her cheek and hit the ground. Alyssa was hanging around in her arms being as lazy as any baby. I remember watching my house fade off into the distance and Savanna's face get smaller and smaller. She waved good-bye the whole time. Once in awhile picking up Alyssa's hand and waving it. Looking down at her and probably saying "wave to daddy." But what did I know?

"You John?" I heard a strong powerful voice wake me from my day dreaming.

"Huh?" I said swinging my head up.

"Are you John Tyree?" he said slowly acting like I was stupid.

"Oh yea, sorry. Yea that's me." I shook my head and look at him. He was a buff tan, tall man. He had a buzz cut and a cut scar at the bottom of his lip. "You Derek Laney?" I asked still studying his features.

"Yea," he walked over to his bed avoiding eye contact with me. "So," he stumbled trying to find something to say, "Looks like we'll be working together for awhile."

"Your training the men too?"

"Yea." Looked over to me finally and kept a stern face, "These men are like Elephants. And we're the mouse. The point of this job is to scare them to work. They wont do anything freely and do it good. They'll do it crappie. They have schedule bedtimes, wake up times, and eating times. They get one day off during the whole week. But that's it. We don't quit working until they are ready to go in to battle. You have to treat these men like your mama treated you. She taught you and you fallowed in her steps. Living up to her expectations."

"Aha," I reached in to my bad and pulled out a shirt. "So we wake up?"

"4 A.M. We get our stuff done, then they get up at 4:45. They have 15 minutes to get out to us. No showing, and no eating. They'll barf it up any ways."

"Ok," I responded to his answer. I was tempted to ask him if I got to go home.

"You're a quite man," He laughed and threw a pillow at me.

"Sorry."

"What's wrong man?"

"Nothing," I shrugged my shoulders and looked at him.

"Listen," he paused, "I don't know you and you don't know me. But we're like brothers. Or we will be. I've heard a lot about you John. James is proud to have you on the team. But that doesn't matter. What happens in this room will stay in this room. So what's on your mind bro?"

"I've left her once," I started, "Then she left me. But she left me for another guy. I left her to go to Iraq. When I came back I found out she was married to a guy I met when I met her. I knew he liked her, I just didn't know he would do such a thing. So after that I said good-bye to her. Planning to never see her again. But now…after 2 years she was standing outside my door. We just had a kid and we plan to-"

"Whoa man! You took her back?"

"I always loved her. It never went away." I pulled the shirt I had on me off and slipped on the other one.

"So…your sad because you left her again? Or you left your child?"

"Both. I don't wanna lose her again," I paused, "what about your love life?"

"I was hopping you weren't going to ask," he laughed and fell back on his bed, "I met this girl in 11th grade. And I had a thing for her. She acted like she had one for me too. So we dated all the way up to college. When then I decided to propose to her. She turned me down. So I decided that it was going to lie alone. When after that I met a girl named Lilly. I found her to be ever most romantic. She died in a car accident. Right now I'm with a girl named Grace. She's wonderful and a great girl. She's expecting and its great right now. But I'm afraid to propose to her because of the last time. I sound like a wimp," he laughed, "Your problem is worse than mine."

"Ehh,"

"Well we should get to bed. We have to wake up early tomorrow morning." He walked over to the light switched at turned it off. "Night."

The next day I was standing outside waiting for the men to come out. They drug their body out and stood in a crooked line.

"Hello men," I walked along them, "I'm John Tyree, I will be training you guys in these next couple of weeks. I was in the army for 5 years. I quit this year. So I know how to make you guys cry. You will listen to me and call me Sir. Tyree. Nothing else. So you better get used to saying it. Right now lets start off with the name learning game," I paused and smiled at them, "But doing push ups." They moaned and got down to the ground, "No moaning! Here's the deal, we do push ups till everyone remembers every man standing here. Including mine. After that you guys get the rest of the day off. But if any one stops its going to be a mile we will end up running. So I suggest that you do not stop. Miles can surly add up." I blew my whistle and they started doing there push ups. "I'm John Tyree! You call me by Tyree! I'm married and have 1 kid! This is how you young weak men will do this!" they started breathing heavy and the first man started.

"I'm Luc Matheson! You call me Matheson! I'm engaged and I have no kids. I'm 25 years old!"

"I'm Chris Huffman! You call me Huffman! I am married with 1 kid! I'm 29 years old!"

I blew my whistle to let the other guy know it is time to go. I stood there with my arms crossed walking around them. "You have to yell like your the boss!" I stood there and in the background I heard intercom call my name,

"John Tyree. You have a call on line 3. Tyree. Call on line 3."

"You men will stop saying names until I get back. You may stop. But do note that we will be working harder once I get back!" I turned away from them and walked over to the phone. I picked it up and pushed 3, "John Tyree. Newcomer Trainee. How may I help you."

There was a small voice that answered me, "I would like you to direct me to my husband." She chuckled over the phone.

"Hmm," I answered her, "You mean the amazing guy that's right here?"

"Maybe," she laughed. "Ok, John, I wanted to call you because I miss you already. And I'm not sure how I'm going to make it through this. But I mainly called because there's a man here. He claims to know you."

"What's his name?"

I heard the phone being transferred over to the man, "Hello John. Nice to finally talk again."

"Who is this?" I got closer to the phone.

"You don't remember me do you?"

"Apparently not. So who are you."

"I suggest you get home."

**Well?! I hope you like it ^.^ I will edit it and add more in the end. I need help with you guys! ok so this guy made Savanna call him and he turns out to be a guy that knows Savanna. And he wants John to do somethings for him ^.^ So what should it be? Im stuck! I want to have it being tense and the bad part of the story! So please tell me and review!!!!! ^.^**


	8. Chapter 8

I walked back to the field where the men, "boys", where all doing push ups. Once they saw me they stopped and stood on their feet.

"Everything all right Sir?" one man yelled. He was sweating like a pig. Dripping down from his face down to his chest. He took his hand to his head and wiped it across his head.

I looked down to my boots, and then looked up, "K listen, I'm going to be heading home for about a week or two. Something came up. While I'm gone, I need you guys to work hard," I crossed my arms and started walking, "I wanna hear that you all stuck! I wanna hear that I'm training the best men here!" I walked in between them all and looked at them. I made my way back to the front center and smiled, "Do I make myself clear?" They all nodded their heads and looked up to the sky to see a jet taking off. "I'll be giving commander Jake your workouts. I want them done and I want them done right." I looked around and each of the men, "Max, you'll be leader. That means you will be the strongest and I want you to keep these boys in line."

Max stood forward and smiled at me, "I wont let you down Sir."

"Alright," I kept a stern face and turned around and started to walk away.

The only thing that was running through my head was Savanna and Alyssa. Who the hell was there? Who the hell had to see me so bad? Who did I piss off? I started going through people in my mind. _Mike? No. James? Naa. Nick? I don't even talk to him. _I walked in to my room and grabbed my bag. I wanted to cry. I wanted to fall down to the ground and beat my self. Why did I leave her alone? I should have stayed….I should have stayed.

I sat on the plane and held my hands together.

"First time flying?" an old man said looking down at my hands. He had no hair left. Only a mole on his head. His wrinkles and wrinkles.

I looked up at him, "No, I've flown many times before." I let my hands go and let them fall to my knees. I sat back and looked at him. He looked so helpless and kind. Like the kind of old man who tips 50 bucks to the pizza man. "I just need to get home."

"Aha," he said rubbing his chin and turning to look out the window. "Have you ever thought what other people see? What other people feel? Have you ever thought what other people think of you? Do you stop and think when you'll die? When then time for you to leave the planet will come? Do ya lad?" He didn't give me time to answer when he turned around and put his hand on my shoulder, "You married lad?"

"Yes. Just recently."

"Do you tell your wife you love her more than anything in the world? Do you tell her that shes the most important thing to you. Cause lad, one day she may not be there." He turned around and closed his eyes. He left me sitting there in wonder.

The plane landed at dawn and I made my way off. I walked down the streets with my bags on me. I pulled out my phone and called a cab. It arrived shortly after. I sat in the cab and looked out the window. The skies were grey and the air was moist. The streets were empty. People waiting inside for the rain to come then leave.

The cab ride was quite. I didn't say anything.. Nor did he. A few minutes from home, it started to rain. Small drops fell on to the ground and hit the cab. They hit the window, then would race to the edge. I smiled as I thought back to sitting in the car with my dad. Me and him would pick a rain drop and watch them race each other. He always won. Some how he knew what rain drop to pick. Every time. Not once did he lose. Not to any one.

When the cab arrived home, I handed the money to the cab diver, and got out. I stood out side my house and starred at it. It looked so different. And I've only been gone for about a week. I pick up my bags and walked to the door. I listened to my shoes hit the sidewalk with every step I took. The rain was coving the streets and making everything wet and cold. I reached for the door knob, then pulled back fast. Who was there? Is Savanna okay? Why did I have to come home right away? I closed my eyes then opened them. Once again I reached for the door knob and turned it. The tenseness in my body reacted with it. Gripping on to it right, breathing heavy.

The door opened.

I walked in. No one was there. I dropped my bags and threw my jacket on the chair. "Hello?" I yelled looking around the room. The house was cold. The windows were open and the breeze came rushing through. I walked through the kitchen and made my way to the back door. As I looked out, I saw Savanna and a man sitting in a chair. Savanna holding Alyssa in her hands. Rocking back and forth. She stilled looked so beautiful. Just the way I left her. And Alyssa looked to small, calm, weak and carless about the world she was in. I opened the screen door and it made a screech as I pulled it open.

"John!" Savanna yelled standing up with Alyssa. She walked over to me and kissed me. Then she looked back at the man sitting in the chair, "I'll leave you two alone." she smiled and walked inside. I could hear her talking to Alyssa and she carried her to the living room.

"Nice to finally meet you, John." The man said reaching his arm out. He was a middle aged man. Possibly in his early 30's. He had dark blonde hair. He was dressed up and had a clear face. Professional looking, yes. My type of person to talk to, no.

"Hi, Mr.?" I said reaching for his hand then pausing.

"Harry Gage. But please call me Harry." He smiled and grabbed my hand. I smiled, uncomfortable. I sat down next to him.

"So you're the one that called me? Told me to come home?" I had my hands together. Leaving forward. Elbows on my knees. My breathing was calming down. I felt less nervous. But I still felt like something could still go wrong.

"Yes, I'm sorry about the inconvenience Sir," he leaned back in his chair, "but," he paused and looked up at me, "we need to talk. Do you know a girl, by the name of Ashley Walkers?" He leaned forward and put a piece of paper in front of me, "She killed herself last week. And she left a note, listing reasons why she did. You were the only person on there John…this is a serious deal. What exactly did u know and do with her?"

I pulled the paper towards me. On the paper was a girl. A girl I knew. A girl I liked. A girl I loved. My heart stopped. She never did leave my head. I closed my eyes to try to stop the tears. "I….Oh my goodness…." my voice cracked and I broke down.

Me and Ashley met about 5 months ago. I was at a party with my friend and I spotted her standing by the snack stand. I made my way over there and stood by here. She smelled like cherries and raspberries. Her hair was down and curled. Her make up was evenly applied to her face. Her eyes lit up under the light at the party.

Once we started talking she came home with me. We talked and then things got wild and outta hand. That next morning I woke up by her side and I felt wonderful. I felt like someone actually needed me. Someone actually cared about me. I rolled over and wrapped my arms around her and fell back asleep.

We started going out a month later and I fell in love with her. We did everything together. Shopping. Sleeping. Eating. Everything. I loved her with everything I had. I was asked to go back to the war. To serve 4 years. But I wouldn't go. I wouldn't leave Ashley. I didn't want the same thing that happened to me and Savanna happen to me and her. She felt like she was my everything. She was more than Savanna ever meant to me. But one thing that Ashley didn't do, is make promises. She didn't promise she loved me. She didn't promise that she would be with me forever. All she promised was that she would always be her self. And not change for anyone.

One night she said that she was going out with some friends. I said my good bye and watched her walk out the door. That night I sat at home and did nothing. Watched football for awhile. When my phone rang. It was my friend Hunter, wanting to go to a bar. I grabbed my jacket and keys and walked out the door. The drive was quite. I was used to having Ashley talk to me where ever we were going. But not this time. This time I sat in the silence. Listing only to the roar of the engine and I drove down the road. The streets were quite and empty. It was late at night. Ashley was supposed to be home pretty soon. I looked at my phone and glanced at the time, "9:16," I mumbled to myself. When I pulled up to the bar I parked my car. The neon sign flashing, "Beer," and "Open," light up the side walk next to the place. I walked inside. It spelled of pizza and beer. I scratched my head and looked around for Hunter. No where. I dragged my feet on the floor and made my way to a table. I sat down and waited for the waiter.

"Hello, welcome to Buckey's Beer. Can I get you anything to drink or eat today?"

I closed my eyes and then opened them and looked at her. She was an older lady. Lower 40's. She had her hair put up in a bun and had a pen in it. Her apron was tied tight around her body which made her look skinnier than she probably was. She had a wedding ring squeezed on to her finger. Her make up was done like a clown. Lip stick smudged on to her lips. "Um, yeah," I said I looking at her, "Can I have a Coors Light?"

"12oz?"

"Yeah that sounds fine."

She nodded her head and walked away. I looked around one more time, making sure I didn't pass up Hunter. When I saw Ashley. Sitting in the corner, on a guys lap. Making out with him gently. Her hands rapped around his body and his on her hips. Pulling her closer and closer. I sat there. In amazement. Is it every girl? Is every girl out there like this?

I stood up and left. I had no use of being there. I drove home. Holding back tears. When Savanna popped in to my head. Her lips pressed against mine and her smile when I kissed her forehead. Her gentle touch when she would hug me. Everything about her was so perfect. Her body, her love, her kisses. Maybe she was the only one for me. The only one that can make me smile. The only one that will ever make me as happy as I was. But she was gone. And she would never come back.

"John?" Harry said touching my knee. I wiped my eyes and took a deep breath. "There's one more thing that you need to know," I leaned forward and looked at him.

"Cant be as bad as this…"

"John," he sat back and reached in to his pocket, "you're the father of her child.."

All of a sudden the whole world around me stopped. Everything I had and knew, would soon leave me. Savanna…what am I going to do about Savanna.

"John…you're the only one who can take care of him."

"Him?" I responded.

"Chase. I'll bring him by tomorrow. I suggest you talk to Savanna." he stood up and walked inside.


End file.
